diary

Dear friend

In the hope of making you feel any better.


I heard the news couple of days ago and I instantly didn’t know what to say when I received the message of our classmate through chat. I didn’t text him right away because I really lack words to utter.

My grandma just passed away Feb. 6 and the sadness is still creeping on me every night. All the regrets just keep flashing before my eyes and I can say, I never really had moved on yet.

Here’s a crazy fact about me, I have fancied death when i was a child. I love reading quotes about death. The beauty of death has captured me during those times like it was never really a different thing in the world except that it makes all things disappear and go to somewhere else I don’t have any knowledge of. As a kid that was death to me.

But now, after my lola passed away, I see it as a passage way to the Kingdom of God. I mean, it is the only way for a person to reach our Real Home which He had prepared for us. And that is where my lola and your dad are going.

I can still remember the tears my father had cried. It was countless. I’ve never seen him breakdown like that. Never until my lola’s funeral. He’s hugging my mom and his youngest sister, the three of them were so weak because of constant crying. During the wake days, he was sad but still entertains visitors, talks and drinks with his old friends. I never thought though I should have that his heart is tearing and breaking into small pieces that can never be mended anymore. I just saw that when reality strikes and that our lola’s body have to be buried six feet under the ground.

That moment was unforgettable and indeed agonizing. And now, I can say, that a friend of mine suffer the same situation. I may not know how he feels. I may not still have the correct words to say to make him feel better but all I want to say is that you are never alone.

I don’t ask him to feel better in an instant. I’m not reprimanding him to stop crying or what so. I just want to send him my deepest condolences. And that I am a friend always in his side. Pardon me for saying all this cliche but this is really what I want you to know.

We, all your classmates in our block, have been praying for your family. No, don’t thank us for doing that. You don’t have to because at the very beginning you deserve this kind of love and appreciation.

And please know that I’m doing this not because you’ve helped me in any way. I’m doing this because I know that you need me and this is the only way that I know I can make myself be expressed. I hope I’m able to heal a portion of your heart.

Here’s just another simple request from a not-co-close friend of yours:

Please be strong. Strengthen your faith even more. Don’t ever think that you are alone in this because you certainly are not. I know that what you’re experiencing is genuinely super hard and no blog post can remove the sorrow just remember God’s promises and believe that your father is safe and watching you with Him. You don’t want your dad to feel sad because you are sad, right?

Condolence, Vince.

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