I can only pray
Contrary to my previous post about having the most boring week in my life, I just realized that so many things happened to me this month. Considering that it isn’t really over yet. I have encountered the weirdest people, dealt with the most irritating ones and forced myself to be accepted at times. So many challenges came to me especially at school. From our professor who isn’t really that considerate, to the quiz results which are so not in my favor. I paid 500+ pesos for this semester’s tuition fee and I cannot afford to put my parents’ money to waste that’s why even though I am not that in the mood whenever I go to school — which is because I have an OJT — I still try my hardest to attend every meeting on time. I comply with plate requirements which I remember our professor saying that it should be presentable and/or beautiful. I thought a good and clean handwriting might make an impact but then I got a grade the same as the ones who seem to have just written theirs minutes before we should submit it.
I know I’m not that good in Structural Theory II and I even failed Theory I but it’s not that I didn’t exert any effort at all. God knows how I wanted to absorb and learn everything that our professor says because I know Theory II is a very crucial part of Civil Engineering. But sad to say, I cannot cope up with the fast-learners and second-takers of our batch. My only point is that I never neglected the subject. I go to school every day, I attend classes and do my plates. I even submit mine on time — not during the extended submission hours. If only the discussions were not that fast and the exams are close to the given examples. I admire the first takers who got high grades. Especially Donna and Glenn. They deserve what they got. But me, why?
I admit I didn’t study that much and I really, badly regret not staying up late just to answer some examples from the book but still, who can blame me, there are times when I really didn’t understand a thing from what he’d said. My Theory I, I can say, is really not that strong of a foundation and so my Theory II, sprinkled with other things sadly resulted to this.
All in all, I am still certain that I haven’t done anything wrong to deserve this. I never disregarded the subject and even begged for him to let me sign up in the attendance sheet during the time when I came 1 minute to 7pm which is the cutoff time of the attendance. I hope he can see how badly I want to pass his subject and I am still prying that the Lord may touch his heart. I am so desperate.