Casually hoping I am not too late but hey, Happy New Year!!

2020 came rushing like a meteorite shocking everyone with its head on impact. As if a year was compressed to a month and it literally was just the first of the new year. I guess I need not to enumerate as a list of the events have been circulating on social media lately but I sincerely hope everyone is doing well now.

These happenings actually influenced my coming back to blogging, somehow. Even though I have planned on having my domain hosted since December last year, I had errands that needed more attention so it had to wait. But now, the blog is back. And I am very grateful.

I have this favorite quote that I read somewhere, maybe on social media which says “Look for the dream that keeps coming back; it is your destiny.” I liked the thought that in this world, especially in this time when opportunity has become rare because everyone seems to be so great at things that it is even harder to keep up, still there is this one thing that is destined for you and you just have to see it for yourself.

I am going 28 and honestly, there were so many things that I wanted to achieve by this age when I was a younger teen or even during my daydreams. To not be so hard on myself, I actually achieved some and this blog is one of them. And it feels refreshing coming back. Is writing my destiny? I hope so. Writing a book is one of my dreams, too. Thinking about it now makes my heart happy and inspired.

Thinking about dreams and inspirations, I become interested in knowing other people’s inspiration too. To anyone reading this, are you into writing also? Or maybe owning a coffee shop? Probably designing clothes? I’d love to know them. Please share on the comments if you have spare time.

By the way, I would like to thank my friend, Nadine, who has always been my go-to sensei for blogging since day 1, for helping me bring this blog up yet again this time.

Check out her site for affordable web hosting plans: http://www.oh-rainbow.net

Again, happy new year everyone!

Today is May 14, 2019. Weeks prior, I so wanted to have a manicure but since I had to make way for a more important color to touch my fingernail, it might have to take another week or so. Until it disappears naturally, I can only wait. Because not a nail polish, but a sign to avoid electoral fraud, a mark which shows that a citizen already cast a vote at an election, an indelible ink is what’s visible on my index finger as of now.
Figuratively, it is a symbol of one’s right being exercised. And yesterday, the Philippines held its mid-term elections for 2019.

Naturally, one would always wish for a clean and peaceful election especially here in the Philippines. Had it ever happened? Let us just wish again.

And it’s saddening that the stronger our desire for a positive and healthy election, the more it brings out the toxicity we so openly toss at each other. A never ending purge of emotions.

Even long before the campaign period starts, difference in opinion creates an invisible line between the pro’s and the con’s —no matter the point, no matter the idea, there will always be a “You’re right.” and “CAN YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU’RE SAYING?” side.
As the election period progress, the lines start to have colors encompassing its own corresponding sides.

Having an opinion is inevitable, standing your ground for it is just what’s right. But sometimes, we value our own opinion so much that we overlook others’. The sad truth is we listen to respond not to understand.

We value our own opinion so much, we forget we are Filipinos under the same fight.

Along with the election results are friends degrading a friend because his political views are different, hurting a co-worker’s feelings because she decided to follow their religion’s practice. While we should be supporting one another in this journey, we call each other “Bobo,” “Tanga.” Filipino after Filipino hating each other. Truth is, nobody won, with this mindset, with the nation being this divided, we all lost.

Until we can overcome this kind of mentality, we can only hope.

Facebook’s “On this day” feature can actually be a worth-scanning through at times. My cosplay from a year ago was the featured memory today. Curious because it was a cosplay convention that I enjoyed, I decided to check more throwback posts. I did find a few cosplay-related ones but one off-cosplay status of mine of the same memory lane stood out to me and lead me to writing this post.
It was a shared photo from Quote Catalog and I simply captioned with a single letter “K.” The shared photo says, “If it weren’t for second chances, we’d all be alone.”

Two years have passed since the post but I instantly knew what that “K” meant.No, it didn’t mean a shorter “Okay.” nor “Fine,” and most definitely not potassium. But a person.

This may be a little cheesy emotional starting from this point so I would understand if you can’t read on. I didn’t have a Valentine’s post too so this would do.

A couple of years back, life made me experience something that I can only see in movies, something I never knew was survivable. Luckily, I am here writing this so, I survived.I know being heartbroken is but a part of life. That being left behind, is a common challenge most people in this world faces. My heart back then was so young and carefree and also very fragile. I was left by a person I loved. Everything happened so instantaneously, a piddling sting of pain in my heart still twinges whenever I think of it. It was true what every heartbroken person says. Along with your heart, your world will crumble to pieces. Mine was shatterred to inumerable debris that I didn’t know if I can start again. Had I known, I could not fathom how.

That was back then.

Good thing it is also true, that time can heal our wounds.Day by day, a part of the universe appears to me to help me get back up or at least make it another day until another help comes. That kept me going. And that was the best thing that happened among every other episode in this experience — I kept going. From day 1 when I can barely open my swollen eyes to day whatever when I finally, personally chose to heal, I kept on moving forward. Through the help of everyone around me who actually cared, I survived. They were the answers to my prayers. Literally heaven sent angels and I will forever be thankful to God for their existence.

I continue moving on up to this day when I tell the story to share a lesson rather than an emotion. Part of my recovery is accepting that I had my faults as well. I realized that I also had my mistakes that lead to the downfall of the relationship. At some point, I put all the blame on my wrongdoings and thought that no one will ever choose me again because of my past mistakes.But thanks to that post by Quote Catalog, I was reminded that I am still worthy to be loved. Along with my mistakes are the realization that failing, does not mean an end. Failure is just an opportunity for us to start again, this time, smarter.

Now that I am looking at it at a better angle, I am able to say that hardships, failing relationships, rejection, are all parts of our life that we cannot run from. Negative happenings serve as turning point for our improvement. Heartaches lead the way to healing and second chances. We just have to make ourselves look at the brighter side of things.

K, the person that I was referring to in the caption, is my second chance in love. He accepted me and made me feel that whatever happened in the past is part of the past. He taught me to take the hardships as stepping stones to see a better view of the future.

At a certain part of our lives, we’ll face challenges. It is something that happens unexpectedly or as outcomes of our decisions but once that’s it’s already there, we have no control over it anymore so make use of what you can do,make the best of what you have and that is yourself. Choose to be better, choose to heal, look forward to your second chance.

I couldn’t believe January passed by just like that. And February felt rushing into something as well now. Next thing we know, we’re putting up Christmas decorations once again. But for now, I want to savor the fresh feeling of a new beginning. How I wish, I have the power to control time — to slow it down when I want to or to make it run fast when I needed to also.

2016 has been full of lessons and blessings to me. And while most people hated that year, I was thankful that I get to live through it albeit the struggles and all. That made me be more positive entering 2017. I am slowly learning to let go of what slows my progress down. I learned that in order to grow, we must be willing to accept what can be and what must not.

Fortunately, my few friends remained and a few more were added this year. I look forward to more gigs with my guitar center warwick fanatic friend, my cosplay group, my workmates and am looking forward to travel more this year. Hopeful I can give the same enjoyment to my family as well.

To sum up my first 31 days of 2017, the feeling of gratutude tops all other feelings. During those first 31 days, I already faced life-changing decision-making moments and I am thankful that I am surrounded by people who loves me enough to tell me their true sentiments to help me make up my mind. All the more, I am thankful that God gave me those people to always make me feel supported and who also remind me that the best advice still comes from Above.

Would love to know about your first 31 days of 2017 also. I wish you could comment them down below or if you’ve posted it on your blogs, can I see the links so I can read it too?

1 month down, 11 more to go. Spread positivity this 2017! <3

Yes. With all the drama and heartaches, I became a year older again.

My birthday this year felt quite different. I don’t know but deep inside me, a feeling of having to act maturely takes place. It’s funny how often it strikes me. Even while washing the dishes or preparing the pasta for the spaghetti. I feel it. I have to change now. I am 20.

A sudden sense of responsibility also seem to be pouring on me as if an invisible hand is pushing me towards a task that I am not actually doing before. Can it be called human nature? That feeling when you feel like you have to do something because you are old enough to do it.

But still, the little girl in me will never fade. I still have a lot of growing up to do and today is my first step towards it.