friendship | LDF Musings | Uncategorized

LDF Musings: PH to JP

By on October 11, 2016

Fangirling lead us to each other during our college days. Willing rivals turned sisters from different parents. It wasn’t at all hard being friends with someone as nice as Charmaine though. And I’m thankful that despite us both being introverts, we managed to click and be each other’s extrovert.

We met and built our friendship here in the Philippines but Charmaine is in Japan right now so we sort of call what we have as LDF, short for Long Distance Frienship. Hehe.

I am starting my LDF Musings portion here in my blog because we’ve been apart for too long but I realized we got closer this time because we get to talk about more mature matters online. I want to share here some things that I know can help not just me but also other people who experience the same circumstances as me and Charmaine. Hoping that the both of us can learn through the process as well.

Charmaine will be staying in Japan until 2018 so here’s to more self-improvement from PH to JP through LDF Musings! 🙂

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“Speaking of the devil”

By on June 9, 2013

Well, if the quotation marks aren’t enough for a disclaimer, let me just say that I only used this expression to express the thought that I was writing about them and then his name suddenly popped up my Facebook page and do not mean anything to relate him to “the devil”. I just hope we’re clear here. 😀

Okay. Well… I never planned for this kind of introduction but since we’re here, let’s just keep going.

If you happen to read my blog about my job, you must have already known that there are two persons whom I already considered as my “most-valued” friendst there. We have only known each other for a few weeks but I really felt sad when they have to transfer to another shift leaving me with the other trainees.

I may sound rude but I am sure the others can notice this already. That I treat these two a little different than theirs. They don’t even care at all. Which makes my work a little lighter.

And so there. I am writing this because I can’t find any other way to express my sadness-covered-by-i-can-do-it-facade. I used to be an extrovert locked inside a shy-at-first girl’s body. In every conversation, I was never expected to provide the topic or sustain the flow of it but as I know the person, I get comfortable and further unleashing my extrovertedness. I am noisy, silly. I react on impulse. I am childish.

I love people. It’s just that I am poor when it comes to nurturing the relationship. I always feel that I annoy every person that I talk to and these two, I know I have never been so wrong on my theory. I know I annoy them by my constant attempts of being close to them. I am but a happy kid when even for the last time, we spent time together and took pictures that somehow showed the playful side of us just like before, when my childishness hasn’t crossed the line of their patience.

Jedi (blue) RK (pink) me (yellow)


I don’t know what to say anymore. I really just want to pour out my emotions. Like how I miss them. So much.

I used to go outside our building with Jedi to buy pizza kariman at a nearby Ministop. I used to have lunch breaks with RK. I used to be so happy during our shift because I can talk to them through this official messenger of the company called Spark. I used to be excited to go to work to see them. I used to loiter with RK as we savor the remains of our one hour break —- mostly at TL Nathan’s station where I stopped going to now during lunch.

Now, everything has changed. I have never eaten a kariman since, I microwave my food alone, I go back to my station after eating, I lost interest in Spark. Miserable might be a very big word but during the first days, it really felt close to it. I am sorry for the other people around me because I always look for the ones not around. I don’t know but it’s just really hard to accept because like what I’ve said, I valued them so much already.

So much that I have written it here where the whole WWW can read about how unhappy I am at this point in my career life.

I know. I believe. I envision. That one day, I’ll be able to get by. If they can they so can I. There will come a time when I’ll look back at this post and just laugh at myself on how emotional I have become towards these two persons whom I have once shared a great friendship with.

Yes, friendship.

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Teacha, I…miss…plends.

By on

plends = friends /f/, /r/

If you are or were a Neungyule teacher, you will understand this at first glance. But if not, let me explain it briefly.

In Neungyule, we teach Korean students how to use the English language in their daily lives. We don’t go much into the principles but we make sure that we are able to provide new information after each class. And the equation thingy above is an example of that. Those are called ‘encodings’. A part of the teaching so that the students will be able to note about their pronunciation and grammar errors as well as the proper way to say it.

In my almost two months of stay in this company, I have never felt so bored than last Friday. When I did less things than I usually do.

Which made me miss the only persons whom I have easily learned to get along with from the start. I have said this a lot of times but there really is something about them, I don’t know what, but they are so special to me now.

Maybe there really are persons that are just like that. Maybe it’s in their personality. Besides I haven’t really met such persons. They were able to understand me even if we’re just a few weeks in each others’ company. I admire their sense of humor, the clever jokes that we pass on to each other and the happiness that they bring. The I-have-never-felt-like-this-before happiness if I may say.


Now that we can rarely see each other, I became afraid of what will happen to me as I continue my Neungyule life without them. I even dreaded that they might forget me. Honestly, it pains my heart even until now.

Good thing, the signs have been very clear into relaying the messages to me. Yes, I value them a lot and our shift differences should not change that. Even if their pleasantry towards may change, I will still consider them as my most valued friends. I miss them every minute. I can only hope they knew.

In this world, people really come and go. I have proven that a couple of times. The big difference comes from the way of dealing with the loss or departure. We cannot tie all the people that we love on our waists just because we got used to always being with them. People are people. We learn from different experiences. Take goodbyes as a challenge of becoming the most of what the people in your life have brought you. No matter how long or short they stayed in your life.


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By on January 31, 2013

My relatives say that I look snobbish and they’ve been wanting me to change ever since but I don’t know, I am not capable of starting a conversation or even just to share the first smile. Maybe that explains why I have a few friends only and I don’t care about being alone when they’re not around at all because in the first place, I am not that friendly and second, others don’t know my “language” so we wouldn’t understand each other.

When around my friends, I am the clown, I am the joker. I always fool around but when they’re not with me, I am all reserved and quite and I try my very best not to make eye contact with anybody so that it won’t start a conversation. But I don’t hate people. I am not anti-social. I am just shy. I am afraid that my topics were too boring and that I may annoy whoever I talk to.

cai thesis

That’s why I am very thankful to God for giving me the friends that I exactly need. They are the ones who I can tell my deepest, darkest secrets and be confident that nobody else will know it except us. They understand me when I am in pain and though we are not used to comforting each other, they are very welcome with what problem I am sharing. They support me with the things that I love doing and I do the same to them but they don’t tolerate anything that involves skipping classes just to have fun with each other, lying to our parents just to go somewhere, being reckless for the sake of love or anything that other kids think are the “cool” parts of friendship. We treasure each other as if we were from the same uterus.

I love them as much as I love myself. I love them more than my Heechul posters and videos, I love them more than people love pizza. I am really, really grateful to have friends like them. They may be few but they fill my life with joy.

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By on January 26, 2013

During thesis-making days, we often do sleepovers at Roger’s house. Roger is one of my groupmates and their house is the nearest to our school that’s why. The people there are very hospitable. They always provide us delicious foods and sometimes even let us bring home some of the fruits in their farm. Yes, they have a farm!

They are an extended family and everyone are really very nice. There’s this kid named Gamaliel. He’s shy and he rarely talks when we’re around but Roger says that he’s such a talkative child. I adore him because he is closer with me than the other members of the group. We share Milo and he always says goodbye to me whenever we’re going home. I don’t like kids that much but when I do, they become my favorites. And Gama is one of my few favorite kids. Well, there are only two of them anyway. Gama and Darwin our neighbor. 🙂


Last Christmas I gave them basketballs because that’s what I can only afford. I am happy that they seem to like it even if that’s just a simple gift. When I grow up and has a high-paying job, I would give this kids more Christmas gifts. I am not even their ninang. Hehe.  I just adore them so much. 🙂

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SM Free Movie Day

By on December 10, 2012

Like what I always say, I love free stuff. That’s why when a friend recommended about this free movie app on Facebook, I immediately tried it out and luckily for me, after a series of unfortunate events regarding the registration, I was still able to get myself and my friends our vouchers.

We chose to watch The House at the End of the Street just because Katniss is the main character. LOL yeah, I still call her Katniss. Even when were already watching and the scenes were so scary, I can’t help but yell, “Katniss use what have you learned in the Games!!” Hahaha! I think our group were the loudest ones because we were a bunch of scaredy-cats. I can even hear our neighbors mocking our screams which scared us even more.

Yet, it was a great experience. It was our first time to watch a movie together as well. If it weren’t for the free movie passes. Thanks to e-Plus and SM Cinema. 🙂

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Vintique: Le awesome app

By on November 19, 2012

During our free time at school, me and my friends either take photos or make funny covers of different songs. Sometimes we are using YouCam to take photos or Roger’s iTouch but when Mr. Rich Guy just bought his new iPhone 4s, the new wave of camwhoring began again. And this time, we focus on using different photo apps. Just because it’s a smartphone and apps are everywhere.

As I explore his iPhone, I notice this app named Vintique. It’s cute icon caught my attention and tried it right away. Just as I thought, Roger hasn’t used it yet. He’s the type who keeps on downloading apps but leaves the exploration in us. Good thing I was bored that day and tried it out.

The app has such cool effects. Something that people who like vintage photos will love. It also comes with different editing options such as frames and different photo adjustments.

My group’s favorite is the “dim past” effect and as usual, we take photos of ourselves looking like those who lived hundred years ago. Hihi. That’s all for now. I’ll explore more apps some time. 🙂

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Dong Hae Fat Choi

By on August 17, 2012


Super Junior fans, don’t get mad. I am a die-hard ELF too. This is not intended to offend Donghae.


My college friends and I went to Divisoria last August 13 to window shop for outfits that we can use as inspiration for our graduation pictorial held yesterday. We came across this cosplay shop and you can guess what happened. We can’t afford anything from that shop so we went home with the ideas instead. Hehe!

Roger, the richest of us all, isn’t much of an anime fan so he just relies on our suggestion on what costume he will use. The ultimate otakus, Clarence and Donna, suggested some pretty interesting characters that fit him but Roger is still on second thoughts. I then suggested that he can just buy Donghae’s outfit in Bench. I am the one who told him to have a haircut like Donghae as well so why not go Donghae all the way, right? That’s how he became Donghae Fat Choi. Meh!

The next day, Tueday, I was late for my only subject that day so I stayed at school until Roger asked me to accompany him to buy our group shirt. Feeling lonely as hell, I obliged. We went straight to Trinoma and looked for Perfect White Shirt but the stocks are limited that the only ones left are those for girls. Trinoma isn’t a very near place from home so I told Roger to buy his outfit there so as not to waste our effort.

We went to Bench and after I fangirled for a few moments, I asked the crew if they have Donghae’s polo in that photo above. They said they only have the cardigan and not the polo so he bought the Super Bench shirt for me instead. After all the travel for his outfit, we ended up buying a polo in Bench branch at Shangrila Mall and a white polo shirt at Mint.

Just as I thought that he has made up his mind already, he still kept on asking on what he’ll look like on the pictorial he even thought of buying Men’s Falt Caps to match his outfit but later on realized that his new haircut will be hidden. The flat caps look good anyway but with his outfit, he’ll look too over the top so I told him to just wear it next time.

Graduation pictorial day came and here’s how Donghae Fat Choi looked. 😀

Thanks to the make up artists, we were able to come up with a fairly good creative outfit for him without posing topless just as most of the boys in our batch did.

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Last minute summer feeling

By on June 27, 2012

The start of school days marked the ending of long sleeping hours and unlimited internet surfing because summer has officially ended. No more free times do to whatever or just stare blankly at something when we run out of things to do. Oh summer, why did you have to go?

But at least, two days before my classes start, I have had the chance to do the very thing that defines somebody’s summer experience: SWIMMING.

Bea and her friends planned a swimming get together a month ago and the long wait finally came to reality. We went to Midori Resort for an overnight stay where we ate hotdogs, pork chop, chicken and tofu while we swam the whole night! It is a private resort in Cavite and I can say that the place is perfect for group gatherings and because it’s far from majority of the residences, it is okay to sing on the videoke all night long. 🙂

Sorry for the quality of the image. I haven’t uploaded the photos from our digicam yet. LOLS

The swimming pool is spacious enough to let 10-15 persons swim freely at the same time. Though seen as one, it is divided into two sections where the first part is,I think, 3 feet deep while the other has much higher water. It has slides too, the slide on the first part is a short one and I actually felt my butt hit the swimming pool floor when I tried it. The curvy and longer slide has more challenge to try out. I enjoyed playing with Dhiem, Scramble, Chuck and Bea there. 🙂

If a survey is to be conducted, maybe I would top the “Who stayed in the swimming pool and only got up when there’s food?” question because indeed, I enjoyed swimming so much and I don’t go swimming often so I treasured the moments. All in all, I enjoyed hanging out with them especially my slide buddies. Hahaha!

Ely, Dhiem, Bea and me (i’m sad because other slide buddies are not in the photo. T^T)

I am glad that Bea got to meet friends like them. They really appreciate Bea’s beauty and often jokes that they want a kiss from her. Hahaha!

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I never knew I could go this far

By on May 30, 2012

First, let me prepare you about the extreme disassociation of the title to the real story. If you think that this is some kind of cheesy or wild or any serious matter, well, guys you need not think too much because this is simply about my unexpected success in spreading the KPop Love! Haha!

Donna, Clarence and I sometimes sneak into our boss’ computer to watch videos of our own favorites during breaktime until one day,  as I force those two JPop fans to watch BigBang’s music video of Fantastic Baby, I was surprise that they actually liked it. But the like there is because they make fun of some of the scenes. For me, it’s okay because at least I got to let them watch it and I somehow took it as a stepping stone. Since then I started showing them photos of BigBang especially T.O.P. because he’s my bias so I have way too many photos of him in my flashdrive. Haha!

And then suddenly, this photo showed up. A photo I never knew would bring me to this reign appeared and my world is changed.

They obviously loved him here. I saw them fangirl over this photo just as they do when they talk about or see their anime crushes. From then on, we watched BigBang’s videos together and even though the funny part is still greater to them, I am already thankful that they get to appreciate the thing that I also love.

But as I thought I’ve reached the peek of my success, I was prove wrong by the sudden request of Clarence to put T.O.P.’s picture in her MP3! This is really a milestone in my advocacy in introducing KPop to my friends. Yahoo! And the fortune never ended there when she asked me to put Blue (Big Bang’s song) in her player. I was in cloud nine that time. All I could think about is “How come that this Otaku, anime-lover, Jpop fan suddenly asks me to ad a KPop song in her player?” I must be dreaming but no, I am even pinching myself.

I am really very happy that somehow I manage to let them see the beauty of KPop. Considering that they are JPop fans and it is a given fact that JPop fans hate KPop and KPop fans for they think JPop is the original trend or whatsoever. I find JPop beautiful too and I don’t hate the fans. I just wish they won’t hate KPop too. Because sometimes Donna’s denial in public about her appreciation to KPop makes me sad. Still, I don’t hate her and her love for JPop and anime. 🙂


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